


Burning Souls

by Reyna_Bennet



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: A bunch of characters - Freeform, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Elemental Magic, Eren Is a Little Shit, F/F, F/M, Good Parent Grisha, Levi/Eren Yeager-centric, M/M, POV Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Slow Build, hopefully happy story, no avatar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-15
Updated: 2017-02-11
Packaged: 2018-03-23 00:22:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 18,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3748507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reyna_Bennet/pseuds/Reyna_Bennet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Eren is an Air Master and Prince of a powerful clan, with no intention of getting a mate.<br/>Levi is a Fire Master and Captain of the most successful Squad in the Legion that has no time to even think on getting a mate.</p><p>But Eren father has different plans, and enlists Eren, Mikasa and Armin in the Legion, a military group of highly trained soldiers.</p><p>This is the story of two men with no interest in love…</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, the first and last paragraphs are in Eren POV. The rest of the chapter is in Levi POV.
> 
> First time writing on first person.  
> Second Fic, in case you have or are reading Shadows For The Night don’t expect the same thing, this story is supposed to be happy, with no mind-fucks.
> 
> Unbeta’ed, forgive any mistakes…
> 
> Enjoy!

 

_Hey Levi, do you remember how we meet? You must have thought I was some crazy conceited idiot… I’m sorry, is just… I was afraid!_

 

The day was sunny, no clouds in the sky.

Me, Erwin and Hanji where walking through some forest, Erwin was laughing at mine and Hanji bickering.

“Levi, you should smile more” four eyes said.

“Fuck off, will you? Why should I smile more if the only thing I see is your ugly ass face?”

“EH! Erwin, Levi said I’m ugly” she sobbed to the taller blond.

They would probably make a good couple. Erwin all tall and blond and blue eyes, with two wisps above his eyes, I think in another world (one full of furry monsters) they may be called eyebrows, not sure. Don’t misunderstand, the fucker looks like some model, and he is hot as fuck, but then you look at those things in his forehead, urgh!

Return to the topic, Levi!

And then Hanji, she was tall for a woman (and taller than me), she was a beautiful woman, when that crazy as fuck smile leaves her face and her eyes lose that manic gleam, with long and curly brown hair that was always in a messy ponytail, with some strands framing her face.

But it’s not because of the appearance that I said they would be perfect for each other… no, the thing that makes them the perfect partners in crime is their intelligence, Erwin is a fucking manipulative and cunning bastard, that seems to be always a fucking mile ahead of others, and Hanji, she is a fucking genius, there is nothing she can’t understand, but just in case something like that appears, she will test it, research it, experiment on it, anything as long as it gives her the knowledge she seeks.

Together they could probably run the world.

 _Be afraid world, the Furry-Eyebrows-Monster and the Mad-As-All-Hell-Science-Geek shall make Titans look like babies._ A shiver went down my spine as I thought that.

“You’re not, Hanji,” Erwin’s baritone voice said “let the man be” I honestly thought it would stay like that, but the fucker had other ideas. “The poor guy hasn’t seen a nice ass in a long time.”

“That’s right! Levi, how did things got with that guy you were seeing?”

“Kill yourself Eyebrows, because if I get a chance to do it, I will make it hurt” I threatened. “And you, obviously, that didn’t go anywhere, or I wouldn’t be spending my day off with you fuckers.”

“You need to get more insults Levi, you’re becoming repetitive.”

“Furry-Monster I will really kill you!”

“Furry-Monster!? That’s new…”

“Levi, do you have a new nickname for me to?”

Only Hanji would be happy and curious about my insult list.

“Why do I still talk with you?”

“Because you love us, and we are your best friends…” Hanji began.

“I think we are his only friends!”

“Erwin, just for your knowledge, I know more than a thousand ways to kill someone without leaving any trace behind…”

The fucker just laugh, seriously? Why don’t people believe in my threats anymore?

“What is the easiest way?” Hanji asked. God this woman sure as hell is crazy…

Wait… I raise my hand, fist close, signaling them to keep silent. There is someone… scratch that, something in this woods with us.

As I reach for one of the rapiers on my back, a fire humanoid runs to us, it tackles Hanji to the ground but before I can do anything, Erwin’s blades cut the base of the thing’s neck, turning the creature into ashes.

Erwin is assisting Hanji, she got injured it seems, so now, it’s me against the things and trying to buy Erwin time to get Hanji the fuck out of here.

Fuck! _How far did we walk?_

A Fire titan throws itself at my head, an Earth one traps my feet.

“You really wanna play that game?” I ask, I could say it was to one of them, but the truth is that they don’t speak, we aren’t even sure if they can hear us, so yeah, it was a sarcastic question.

Focusing, I let my own fire consume me. Let’s be clear, I am what you could call a Fire Master, I can control the fire like, no, better than I can control my hands.

The titan at my feet let go with a strange squeak, and the fire titan bite my sword as I raised it to his head. More titan appeared, and I could still hear Erwin and Hanji.

If only they moved faster, I could get out on here in seconds, my fire giving me impulse to reach the higher branches of the trees around me. I know I am fast, but Erwin carrying an injured Hanji was no fast at all.

Fuck, shit, fuck, fuck, shit, fuck, fuck this shit and get me out of here.

I was still cursing and killing titans when I saw them, three figures, one of them was jumping from three to three with the help of fire, the second looked like a blonde Tarzan, moving with the help of lianas that seem to appear out of nowhere, and then the third figure, he touched nothing as he approach me… an Air Master, and a fucking good one, there weren’t many people in this world that had the type of control needed to fly, but that was what the kid was doing, flying to me… and for some reason, it felt right to say he was flying to me.

The flying guy said something to the other two and they nodded, they both passed me without as much as a look in my direction. The Air kid landed flawlessly by my side, and without words started attacking titans. A titan jumped over us, I turned to attack him with fire when a strange yet familiar voice stopped me.

“Let it be,” the Air kid said “your comrades are fine, my sister is protecting them.”

I beheaded one of the titans.

“Why should I trust you?”

He pushed two back with a gust of wind while killing other.

“If I wanted you dead, I wouldn’t be here, fighting alongside you.”

“I didn’t ask for your help” I spat.

“Sorry, old man. Shall I go then? My sister and friend will be delighted to leave your friends, especially the injured one.”

I bite my tongue, I didn’t need his help, but I knew Erwin and Hanji did. The urge to kick this fucking asshole teeth out was almost overwhelming, almost big enough to make me forget this uncomfortable feeling inside my chest… What the fuck!? Am I having a heart attack in the middle of a fight?

Breathe Levi, calm down, if it makes you feel better you can kick him as much as you want latter, but for now, focus on the humanoids in front of you.

_Hey Levi, it hurt me you know? While fighting alongside you, something in my chest started hurting, at the time I thought it was from some attack, or that I caught a cold._

_Did you feel the same?_


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey Levi, do you remember my sister? She tried to kill you right after that first fight. Honestly at that time, I thought you would die, because until we meet you, no one had ever defeated her.

_Hey Levi, do you remember my sister? She tried to kill you right after that first fight. Honestly at that time, I thought you would die, because until we meet you, no one had ever defeated her._

 

The last titan was killed and, I don’t know how the kid did it but, I was thankful to him. There were more titans than I thought at the beginning, and alone I would have probably been severely injured, if not dead, and Erwin would never be able to take Hange to safety.

But even like that, I didn't thank him, I didn’t say anything. I let myself fall back, relaxing against a tree, the kid by my side did the same with the floor. He lay on the floor, with eyes closed. His hair was long, probably shoulder length, the top half was stuck in some fucked up ponytail and some bangs covered his closed eyes.

He was young, I could say that much, but how young I had no idea.

I kept studying him. He was in some dark baggy pants and a simple t-shirt, on his feet some worn out boots. His clothes screamed poor, but then I saw the bracelet on his right wrist, a large leather bracelet richly worked.

On the front a silver circle with a golden key inside, all around the circle the leather was marked with the symbols of the elements. Every element was embroidered with some precious metal or stone. The bracelet was beautiful, and this boy preferred comfort to visuals, or he was a thief.

“I didn’t stole it” the boy said, while I studied the bracelet it seems he was studying me. “We should go find your friends.”

“Never said you did. And yes, we should.”

“Your face is easier to read than you think.”

He said nothing more, and neither did I. My face was easy to read? Since when?

Even Hange had trouble reading me, and she was my closest friend, even closer than Erwin. But I had no time to think of that now. Erwin, Hange, the Raven girl and a Blond Mushroom where closer to us than I thought.

Hanji was spread on the floor, the Mushroom was by her side treating some wound under the supervision of Erwin.

The Raven was the first to see us.

“Eren” she said walking to the brunet. “Are you ok? Did they hurt you?”

“I’m fine. How is she?”

“She will survive,” Mushroom answered “just some scratches on her chest and arms.”

“Levi, how are you?” Erwin asked me.

“Fine.”

He must have understood that I wouldn’t say anything else because he turned to the brunet, Eren it seems, and the Raven.

“I thank you warriors, we were not prepared for that attack and so we were easy prey for them. Thanks to you three we survived with superficial wounds, you have my gratitude” he bowed to them. “Name your price and I shall arrange your reward.”

“We want nothing from you” Eren said. “We were just passing by when we heard the commotion, I’m glad we could help. But now we must go, we still have a long journey to complete.”

“May I ask for your names?”

“I’m Eren, Mikasa” he said pointing to the Raven, the Mushroom got up and walked to them “and Armin.”

“Jaeger clan, I shall presume” Erwin said pointing to Eren’s bracelet.

“Yes. Can we know yours?”

“Erwin Smith, Hange and Levi. We belong to the Legion.”

Right, we have no clan, well, we did, but when you join the Legion all that disappears. The Legion is one of the three Military Groups that defends the kingdom.

The Military Police, defends the inner territories and takes care of the civilians security (bunch of assholes that do nothing), then the Garrison, protect the smaller villages spread all around the kingdom (most of them are so drunk they can’t even point to their own asses), and then the Legion, we fight in the borders, preventing Titans from coming inside the Kingdom and always thinking of news ways to make it expand (we are a bunch of suicidal idiots).

Inside the Military there is no space for clans, we all fight for the same goal, and we all will end up killed by it.

“Erwin Smith?” Mushroom asked, I know that I now know his name, but Mushroom feats him better than Amin or whatever. “The Supreme Commander?”

“Yes” Erwin face was still in is neutral mask.

“Then I guess we are lucky” Eren said.

He walked forward stopping right in Erwin’s face, he dropped on one knee in front of Eyebrows and grabbed a letter Mushroom had given him, both Mikasa and him copied Eren’s pose, and dropped on one knee with their right hand on top of their hearts.

“As representatives from the Jaeger Clan, we would like to invite you and any other guests you may see fit to the upcoming Summer Festivities.”

“It is an honor” Erwin said receiving the letter with both hands as he, once again, bowed.

The trio got up, and Erwin smiled at them.

“Can I ask if we were the journey you mentioned earlier?”

Eren smiled, that was the first smile I saw from the kid, and damn, he looked so fucking gorgeous…

Hey, Levi! Put a brake on that thought, you are too close to Hange and Erwin to let emotions talk louder than rational thoughts.

Thank god from my conscious, I don’t normally hear it, but I will not say it doesn’t give wise advice occasionally.

“Yes, you were! But our report said you were furthest away from here.”

“Well, in simple terms, it is our day off, so we decided to get away from the base for a while.”

“That didn’t go well…” I commented.

“Obviously!”

“By the way,” Mikasa said “has the midget thanked you yet?”

“The fuck did you call me?”

I’m going to kill this bitch!

“Midget. And I’m not talking to you!”

Ok… I am going to kill this bitch, slowly and painfully!

I walked to her and grabbed her scarf, some red piece of cloth she had wrapped around her neck, and pulled her down until our eyes were on the same level.

“Ok bitch, I am just gonna say this once, so pay attention. Call me midget or anything height related and I will make you eat this fucking diaper you have around your neck.”

That must have pissed her off, because three seconds later I was jumping back getting away from her swords.

“Be careful with that. Those are adult toys, not children.”

She launched forward trying, once again, to cut me. You will need to do better than that! Behind her, Blondie and Eren were speaking with Erwin like nothing was happening.

“It seems your friends don’t like you very much” I said to her with a smirk.

“And why is that?” she was still attacking.

I will say it only once… the bitch was good with the swords.

“If they did,” I attacked, blocking her left sword by hitting her wrist, I approached her “they wouldn’t let you” her sword dropped, kicking backwards I hit the sword hilt, making it rise in the air. In a quick movement, I spun around, grabbed the blade and leaned it against her neck “fight me!”

Her two friends were speechless, Erwin was looking at me with disapproval on his eyes, I just shrugged it off. Stepping back, I returned the blade to her, she grabbed it in silence.

“I don’t say thanks, there is no point in it.”

“Oh-my-god!” the Mushroom was hyperventilating, his eyes jumped from Erwin, to Hange to me.

“Hey Mushroom, you should start breathing.”

“Oh-my-god” he repeated.

Yeah, yeah, we already understood you are one of those religious people, you can stop now.

“This… you… The…”

Erwin looked at him with a fond smile, he put one hand over the shorter boy shoulder and told him to take deep, slow breaths. The Broken-tape did what he was told.

Eren was looking at his friend with surprise and also like he was crazy, Mikasa looked worried, but no surprise there. Why the fuck was Eren surprised? Shit! What the fuck is happening?

“Legion Golden Trio” the mushroom finally whispered.

“Oh for fucks sake… seriously? All this because of that stupid title?”

“Levi” Erwin said sternly. “And yes Armin, you are right.”

“Only shit!”

“The fuck is going on?” Eren asked, looking at all of us.

“Erwin Smith, Supreme Commander” Mikasa said, pointing at Erwin, she then turned to Hanji. “Hange Zoe, Squad Leader and Captain of the Research team. And finally, Levi Ackerman, Special Operations Squad Leader also known as Humanity Strongest.”

Eren eyes were wide, like huge-wide, if his eyes dropped out in that moment I wouldn’t be surprised, shit, I was surprised by the fact they were still on his face. And speaking of faces, those eyes are glued to mine, my face, and I’m not sure if I like the attention. Seriously, normally I would bark and glare at anyone that even looked at me, but now, this kid was staring, STARING, at me and I don’t know why, but I don’t feel any urge to insult or kick him.

_Hey Levi, do you know you were my hero? I heard multiple stories about the young soldier that couldn’t be defeated, a small man that looked like a giant when he fought. When Mikasa told your name and title on that day, I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t look anywhere else._

_I knew I would see you again, but I wanted to remember you as my hero, not my destined one, so I tried to memorize your body, your face and your eyes, especially your eyes._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3  
> "Hey Levi, I could feel you, you know? Even at that distance, I could feel your eyes on me.  
> And even against my will, I liked it, the attention. The idea of being the only person you looked at."


	3. Chapter 3

_Levi, I could feel you, you know? Even at that distance, I could feel your eyes on me._

_And even against my will, I liked it, the attention. The idea of being the only person you looked at._

 

One month had passed, and in that moment, I was sitting on some uncomfortable as fuck chair in Erwin office. Said man was walking around mumbling to himself, the people around him completely forgotten.

“Hey commander” Hange called.

That seemed to get Erwin away from his thoughts, he looked at us confused, probably thinking why we were there. Typical Eyebrows.

 “Why did you call us?” she asked.

“Right, that…” he brushed a hand over his messy hair, he must have done that before. “The Jaegers ceremony is in two weeks,” he began “as you know, I was invited, and in the letter I was given, both of you were to.”

“Why?” I asked.

“Don’t know, but you were, and you are going” he said the last part looking at me.

It was obvious that Hange wanted to go, me, on the other hand, wasn’t really in the mood to drop every-fucking-thing I had to do to go see some overly decorated underage teens shaking their ass to some traditional shitty music.

“Again, why? I have other things to do.”

“Levi, don’t make this more difficult than it has to be. You are going, and that’s not up for discussion.”

And that’s how it ended.

 

We were two hours away from departing to Shiganshina District, Jaeger Clan territory.  And I was fuming, Petra was by my side trying, unsuccessfully, to calm me down. Occasionally I would start ranting and cursing about my luck and the three fucking kids that had brought the message.

For some reason, I still remember their faces, and that was odd for me, normally I would forget faces and names after some days. You can’t be in Legion and remember everyone name, that will destroy you completely, people are always dying, and there are always new names to remember, a person can’t let the old names stay.

But those damned kids stayed, especially the teal-eyed one. And the part I hatted the most, every time his face made an appearance in my mind, my chest would start hurting. I remember Hange saying something about how she met Moblit, her mate, that her chest would start hurting every time…

_Halt! He isn’t your mate, you have no time to think of getting a mate._

Titans have mercy, because they knew I had no time for that shit.

“Captain” Eld, one of the soldiers from my Squad, stopped in front of me and saluted, right fist closed above the heart “Commander Erwin has demanded your presence, the company shall leave in thirty minutes.”

Say what? Did I spent one fucking hour thinking on the damned brat and even more damned mate-shits? Fuck my luck.

Hange was beside Erwin when I arrived, she was bouncing in the same spot while Erwin smiled at her. _Freaks!_

“What do you want Eyebrows?”

“Levi, so good you could join us” he said smiling at me.

“Don’t do that” I said stepping back.

“Do what?” he kept smiling.

“That shit you’re doing with your lips, it freaks me out.”

“What? Smiling? But Levi, smiling is good for you, you know?”

“I know what smiles are, and that shit you’re doing is not a smile, that’s a promise, that I won’t like whatever is to come.”

“Maybe. But for now, shall we enjoy our trip?”

“YES!” Hange screeched “Let’s go, let’s go! I heard something amazing about the Jaeger Clan, and I want to find out more…”

I blocked her out, it would take us at least four hours to arrive at Shiganshina and _kill me now_ if I had to listen to her incessant babbling all the way there.

“Levi!” she screamed in my hears “Call Petra, I need to talk to her.”

I’m sorry Petra, but is your mental health or mine.

“Petra,” I called with no hesitation “come here, Shit-Specks wants to speak with you.”

Erwin said nothing, instead turned around and mounted his colossal horse, I fallowed and mounted mine, a black Stallion.

Some minutes passed before Hange joined us.

“What did you say to Petra?” I asked.

“A theory…”

Say what? No, don’t say what? Hange was silent? Hange was not talking my hears off? This was serious.

“Hange,” Erwin called her, “what theory?”

“During last month, I made some research about the Jaeger Clan, to satisfy my curiosity. And I found two things very interesting. One of them is a legend, something like a curse of the Jaeger family, the second is something about the Prince.”

“Why did you called Petra? She’s not from the Jaeger Clan or Family.”

“I know that, but the Prince is an Air Master, and I wanted to hear a confirmation.”

“Stop beating around the bush” I said “just answer the damn questions! What did you want with Petra? What is the Jaeger Legend about? What about the Prince?”

“Right, let’s start with the Prince. I heard that the Prince is an Air Master,” I glared at her “ok, I already said that. But he can also control the other elements…”

“How?”

“Dunno, that’s why I wanted to talk with Petra. She said that if an Air Wilder studies the different components of the Air than there is a change of being able to do that, but she never had access to that type of knowledge so she doesn’t know how to do it.”

“An Air Master capable of controlling the other elements?” Erwin mussed out loud “That would be a terrific opportunity for the Legion. We need to find out if that is true or not, and if it is, then we have to get this Prince to join us.”

“Shut up, Eyebrows. Continue” I said to Hange.

“The Legend, right? Well, it seems that the Jaeger family is kind off cursed, Carla Jaeger, the last Queen of the Jaegers, had the ability to see Soulmates, in the text I read, was a quote from her, something like she could see the lines of destiny that joined two possible mates together. It also said that she never made a mistake in her forecasts. And…”

That would be a shitty gift to have.

“And…?” Erwin asked. She wasn’t finished yet?

“And… there was a page missing, the only thing I could read was about mates and memories. I don’t know anything more…” the last part was said with excitement, Hange and her incessant thirst of knowledge.

“We have to find out more about that, don’t we?”

Hange smile grew as she nodded with her head. _Poor Jaegers! They have no idea of what is about to hit them!_

Like I said before, it took us close to four hours before we reach Shiganshina, the land was beautiful, cozy houses along the road, well-tended gardens, kids running around like crazy flies, they ran alongside us for a while, then got bored and returned to their houses or whatever they were doing.

Hange was babbling about something, don’t ask, I don’t remember, and I wasn’t listening. Eyebrows was discussing something with someone… I wasn’t really paying attention to them, sue me!

Occasionally I would see a Wilder with some strange uniform walking the streets, they would look at us and salute, then go back to their jobs.

A little girl walked to me, and gave me a flower. A blue rose.

“Thank you for protecting us” she said, before bowing to me.

“Thank you for your support” I answered, bowing my head in respect.

I normally hate talking to people… hate people in general, but I always had a soft spot for kids, they are innocents, still pure from all the hate and corruption in this world. And of course, Erwin would have my head if I disrespected someone in public, especially someone that was supporting us, like that child was.

We reached the palace in less than twenty minutes, calling it a palace was a mistake, it was just, a big fucking mansion. But to someone that lived in a military compound anything big with some decoration looked like a palace.

There were eleven people waiting us, to my surprise one of them introduced himself as Grisha Jaeger, the Leader of the Jaeger clan, or King like most people called him. He guided us through the house to some pretty and overly decorated room.

“Please sit down” he said. He signaled someone and tea, wine and biscuits were brought and spread in a table in front of us. “You must be hungry and thirsty after your journey.”

Hange grabbed a glass of wine and some cookies, Erwin followed her on the wine but didn’t touch the food, I grabbed a glass of tea with some ice cubs floating inside making a clink sound when I raised it.

“Shall we be direct?” Grisha asked.

“Yes, please” Erwin said looking at him.

“I invited you here to make you a proposition.”

“What kind?” Hange asked, leaning forward.

“My son, the next leader of the Jaeger clan; my daughter, next general of the clan; and their friend, the next right harm of the King. I want you to accept them in the Legion.”

“Why should we do that?” I asked.

“They are all Master Wilders, Air, Fire and Earth respectively, they are extraordinary Wilders, but they lack the knowledge needed to rule a Clan like this…”

“Your son, is he really able to control the four elements?” Hange interrupted.

“Somehow.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means he can… play with all elements, but he can’t control them as well as the respective Wilder.”

“So… he can control them to some degree, but not on the same level, for example, a Water Wilder can?”

“Not on the same level _a Master_ Wilder can. But about that, they should return today, so you can test them tomorrow.”

“What are they thoughts about joining the Legion?” Erwin asked.

“I must say my son has been happier. But they still want to join you.”

“Why us?”

“The Garrison is no place for a future leader to learn about the difficulties, in the best case he would learn to distinguish different types of wine and beer; the MP would only teach him what corruption is…”

“You do know we are known as Suicidal Force, right?” I asked.

“Then my son will feel right at home.”

The three of us looked at him like he was crazy (most likely true), and like we didn’t understand shit of what he said (definitely true).

“He is known as Suicidal Bastard.”

“Nice name for a Prince” I remarked.

“You have no idea. But returning to topic, do you accept?”

“It would be extremely dangerous for us to have a future clan leader in our midst, not so speak of three of what are supposed to be very important people in the future.”

“The Legion shall receive every help the Jaeger Clan can provide…”

Political bullshit and power games, I hate that shit, so I focused my attention on the paintings around the room, landscapes of the area, one of the portraits was of a beautiful woman with long brown hair pulled into a low ponytail over her shoulder, a captivating smile and warm chestnut eyes. I couldn’t read the name under the painting, but I supposed it was the last Queen, Carla Jaeger.

And that made me think on the soulmate shit Hange was talking about on our way here. It must had been boring as fuck seeing the possible soulmates walking around you, all the lines connecting them, poor woman, did her son have the same thing going on? I didn’t know what I would do if I saw lines everywhere around me.

It was bad enough to see sparkles every time two soulmates touched for the first time.

To the soulmate shit start working, the soulmates must touch each other, flesh on flesh, for example, two soulmates run into each other and bump shoulders, if one of them has a shirt or scarf covering them then nothing happen, but if both are with bare shoulders then a strange light covers them, and to prevent physical pain they will, most likely, hold hands or keep touching each other during the next hours.

It’s a pain in the ass, imagine one day of your life lost because you couldn’t get away from your Soulmate… imagine your Soulmate was an asshole?

_I will keep true to my words and keep far away from anything even related to my mate. Don’t have time to that shit!_

A girl no older then sixteen walked into the room and bowed to us.

“My Lord, the Prince’s Squad has finally arrived.”

“Send them here as soon as they can.”

“I’m afraid that won’t be possible, my Lord.”

“Why not?”

“It seems they haven’t slept in four days.”

“Hum, I see! Go then, prepare them something to eat, and the rooms for our guests.”

“As you wish, my Lord.”

“What did she mean with “haven’t slept in four days”?” Hange asked.

“Well, sometimes during missions the Squads aren’t able to sleep, the problem in this situation, is the Prince… how do I say this, if he spends more than three days without sleep, his personality changes… not in a good way.”

“He’s like Levi, then.”

“Shut up, Four-eyes.”

She is right about that, I have a really fucked up sleep schedule, but if a stay a long time without it, then get out of my way if you like your head between your shoulders.

“Sir!” a guard walked inside the room with no warning, he messily bowed before speaking “A group of thieves is destroying all the stores on First Street!”

“What about the guards on patrol?”

“Most of them are down with severe injuries, the rest is trying to fight them the best we can but with no success.”

“It seems my presence in required elsewhere, forgive me” with that the King left the room.

With no second excitation, Erwin, I and Hange left the room following him.

To our surprise, he was stopped in front of the mansion looking away. Three figures where calmly fighting a group obviously bigger.

A fire whip lashed onto two figures throwing them to the ground where uniformed guards quickly restrained them. Lianas and rock columns rose from the ground hitting another couple of attackers.

“You’re here, good” the King said. “Let me introduce you, those three are the ones we were talking about. And that is my son.”

At that moment, the third figure rose in the sky, flying above the houses, I couldn’t move my eyes, and I didn’t want to, in front of us a deadly beautiful dance was taking place.

The Prince was obviously pissed, the Air around the city was cold, the wind violent against the houses, trees and people, every time the attackers threw something at him, be it fire, water, rocks or more wind every attack was blocked, stopping at least a meter away from the Prince.

And then it started.

Something I will never forget in all the years I live.

The fire formed a circle around him, the rocks shattered and joined the fire in a dance around the Prince, two elements where now circling the man without touching him or touching each other, the water was the next elements to join, the air was already there. With the four elements at his disposal the rest of the attackers joined and tried to bring him down, he used water to fight fire, fire to fight air, air to fight earth and earth to fight water, in few minutes all the attackers were brought to their knees in front of the future King.

And I, stupid as I was, couldn’t look away, especially when said Prince turned around and start walking to us. Followed by the other two that had fought in the beginning. As they approached us my breath stopped.

“Father” Eren said, getting down on one knee and saluting with is fist above his heart “we are back.”

That damned kid, even while talking to his father his eyes never left me, and mine never left him.

 

_It was a challenge you know? When I greeted my father I kept looking at you, I wanted you to look away, to make you recognize you were weaker than me. At least that was what I thought back then._

_Is not that I didn’t want to look away, it was just that… I couldn’t! Because the truth was that I DID want to look away, look away from those eyes that made me fell things I didn’t want to, look away from you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CHAPTER 4:  
> «Hey Levi, do you know what my favorite color is? Did I ever tell you what color we are?  
> My mother said to me once that every couple has a color, for example, Armin favorite color is blue, and that was the color I saw between him and Eyebrows.»


	4. Chapter 4

_Hey Levi, do you know what my favorite color is?_

_My mother said to me once that every couple has a color, for example, Armin favorite color is blue, and that was the color I saw between him and Eyebrows._

 

When I woke up in the next day, the day was clear and fresh. Hange was running around asking questions to every, and anyone. Erwin was closed in is room buried in documents.

Trying to run away from Hange, I asked one of the maids where I could find the training grounds and followed her instructions… I may have been lost, the fucking place was huge. After thirty minutes of walking around I started to hear screams and the sound of clashing weapons.

_Fucking finally!_

Soldiers were running around the grounds, while others fought in the middle, some of them were shooting targets with arrows and elements. To my surprise, my Squad was alone in the center of the arena.

Oluo started running but was thrown back, Gunter jumped forward but before his feet touched the ground he was also thrown back…

_What the fuck is going on?!_

In the middle of the circle made by my Squad was someone else, I hadn’t seen him before because of Eld between us blocking my view. Eren was talking to them, saying something that obviously pissed Oluo, and made Petra eyes bulge. Oluo tried to attack again, but stopped midair feet not touching the ground.

“Put me down bastard” he screamed. “Fight me like a man!”

“I’m fighting you normally, it’s not my fault you are too weak to approach me.”

Oluo kept screaming profanities which Eren ignored. He was the first one to realize I was there, and as soon as our eyes meet we both stopped, just looking at each other for a few seconds before Petra saw me.

“Captain” she said saluting, the rest of them fallowing immediately. Eren just looked at me, not bothering with any emotion.

For some reason, unknown to me at that time, it hurt me.

I didn’t want to be there, that was the only thing I could think, I didn’t want to be there if it meant he would look like that, so impassive, empty.

 _For fuck’s sake, why do I care so much about the fucking brat?!_ I thought.

“The fuck are you doing?” my obvious lack of patience showing.

“I asked Eren to fight me,” Petra started “and somehow, all the Squad joined in.”

“As someone managed to touch you?” I asked Eren.

“Not even get close” he said bluntly.

“I see.”

I didn’t know what else to say, I was always shit while talking to others but for some reason I was even worse while talking to that stupid (beautiful) brunette boy… _the fuck is happening to me?!_

*

I was now walking through the same corridors, trying to find my way back to Erwin’s borrowed office. And without my authorization my thoughts drifted to the minutes after my arrival at the training grounds…

As awkward as it may be, my conversation with Eren ended there, neither of us talking, just silently (and awkwardly) watching as Petra beat the shit out of Oluo. Fun fact: they are Soulmates! How that happened? No idea. Who idea was it? Some drunk god probably…

Sometime after he left, leaving me and my Squad in the middle of the arena seeing him walking away. Well… not really, I was the only one to watch him leave, the rest of my Squad to busy kicking the shit out of each other’s to notice.

If I was in a bad humor until then, it just got worse after.

Oluo mimicking me pissed me off, Gunther’s hair pissed me off, Eld talk about his wife pissed me off, and most of all, Petra’s knowing smile PISSED me off on an all new level.

When I finally left them, it felt like paradise. I could see Erwin’s door now.

_Please… be alone! Please, no Hange…_

You know that saying, from bad to worse, or some shit like that? (No? Then let me show you what it means.)

When I walked into Erwin’s office, thinking I would be able to have some minutes of peace, I walked into something I really didn’t want to see.

_What the fuck?_

As soon as I opened the door I wanted to close it again.

 _Too fucking shiny_ , was all I could think of, a tried to focus but I couldn’t see jack-shit.

When the strange glow started to fade I could finally understand what the fuck had happened.

The office I thought and hopped would be empty, was fully packed with Eren, Mikasa, Armin and Grisha as well as Hange, Erwin and now me. And most of us looking with open mouths at the show in front of us.

In the middle of the room was Erwin with his arms spread out and Armin trapped between them with a hand resting against Erwin neck, the previous blinding light now subdued to a faint glow emanating from them. Both their faces showed surprise, eyes locked on each other like nothing else mattered.

W _hy the hell was the mating ritual, or whatever it is called, only happening now?_

My mind was going full speed, in first plan, the subjective part of me was happy for them, the analytical part was trying to find a reason, a cause to the delay and most of all, trying to predict the implications this would create in the future.

Even with my head full of noise created by my own thoughts I still noticed Mikasa frowning face as she fished some silver coins from a waist pouch before giving it to Eren, the latter just smirking as he put them away.

*

We spend two days like that, me getting lost in the million corridors, Hange questioning everyone, Erwin spending time with his new toy, Mikasa glaring at me, and Eren avoiding me.

_Why the fuck is the damned kid avoiding me? Did I do something?_

I was almost sure it wasn’t my fault, after all I didn’t spend enough time with him to deserve this treatment, truth be told, I didn’t spend time at all with the kid.

But it seemed I was the only one to receive the silence treatment.

Petra was drooling over the brunette, it seemed he had started training with her, which made Oluo even more pissed and jealous, so every time I saw Petra and Eren training in the background I could see frowning-Oluo watching them like an owl.

Eld and Gunther were in ‘gastronomical tour’ like they called it, in my opinion it was the wrong name, they should have called it ‘beer tour’ since it was the only thing I could smell every time they approached me.

In conclusion, I was bored out of my mind, which made me even more _fun_ to be around.

So, it was no surprise when on the morning of the third day I sealed my horse and went on my own _tour_ , not around the city like the other idiots, cities were always the same, didn’t matter where you went. No, I decided to explore the forest around the city.

I thought it was a good idea.

 When I was leaving, I felt eyes on me, but looking back I saw no one, ignoring it I went my way. Ok, maybe not all cities are equal. Shiganshina folks were… nice.

While crossing the streets, everyone would walk out of the way, leaving an empty passage for my horse, some even called me and thanked me for my service, I thanked them all, trying to be as polite as I could, I don’t think I succeeded in that, well, tough luck I guess.

I could feel all my stress going away as I got closer to the forest.

 

*ok, I felt like changing the POV, so, let’s abandon Levi for a while :) *

 

Erwin was finishing his lunch when two guards emerged from the shadows.

“Sir, the King send us to call you. It seems Captain Levi is under attack.”

Food forgotten, Erwin started running after the Guards, Armin right behind him, trying to get as much information out of the Guards as he could, what wasn’t much. They didn’t know anything, only that the King had called them.

After arriving at the King’s office, Erwin started asking questions.

“Where’s Levi?” his voice like ice and full of authority, all his men knew they never should disobey him when he talked like that, but he wasn’t talking to his men.

“Sir down, Commander” Grisha Jaeger ordered. “It seems Captain Levi left this morning for a walk, and found a group of farmers under attack from Titans. We don´t have as much information as we would like, but it seems at least three farmers died, and there are more than twenty titans currently attacking them.

“Where are they?” Hange asked.

“Too far away, I’m afraid… no back up would arrive there on time. Even so, I already sent two Squads to back him up.”

“He is the Strongest Soldier, right?” Mikasa asked “He wouldn’t fall under such small force.”

“The point is not the dimension of the group, but the fact he is protecting someone. If Levi is fighting alone he will fight until he dies, making sure that he takes as much with him as he can, but he his protecting someone, he won’t fight like he does normally, especially if the people he is trying to protect can’t protect themselves, he will try to keep them as safer as he can, while avoiding leaving their side” Hange explained. “Do you remember when you helped us?

“He was alone” Eren said for the first time.

“Yes, to gain us time to get to safety he stayed behind.”

“I don’t understand” Armin joined in. “You just said he wouldn’t leave anyone alone, but he left you. He left you alone!”

“Because he trusts me, he trusted me to get Hange to safety, he believed I would be enough to protect her in case he failed. Now tell me, in the group of farmers he is protecting now, is there anyone he can trust to protect the rest?”

“I don’t know” Armin answered looking at the floor.

“Exactly. That’s why…”

Erwin couldn’t end his phrase as a new Guard entered the room.

“My King, we have a problem, it seems the Titans have merged.”

All occupants of the room ran to the nearest window, seeing with open mouths and frightened faces, as a fifty meters Titan raised himself from the ground.

“He can’t fight it alone…” Hange low voice said, as the beast raised an arm and punched the floor.

Normally a titan was two meters tall, but sometimes two or more titans would merge, creating a bigger and more powerful Titan, a soldier could easily deal with a two meters’ titan, but if the titan reached or surpassed twenty meters then a Squad was needed, and so was the maneuver gear that was safely and uselessly stored inside the Captain’s room.

“Eren…” Mikasa mumbled to her brother.

“No, that’s not my problem. He is not my problem.”

Erwin eared everything, but couldn’t find a meaning to it. What were they talking about? Did Eren knew a way to save Levi?

“He will die” Armin joined in. “I don’t know what happened between you two, but right now you are the only one that can reach him in time to prevent a major tragedy.”

“He is not my problem” he said again, turning around and starting for the door.

“Eren Jaeger!” Mikasa screamed “I don’t like him, and you know it. I don’t approve, and you know it. But you will be the one to get hurt the most, and I can’t watch you go through that again.”

“There is nothing for me to go through, because nothing is happeni…”

Before he could finish, Eren’s hand flew to his chest and he fell. His face contorted in a painful mask, his body shaking.

“Fuck” he said as tears started falling down his face. “Fuck…”

He punched the floor, and against all his previous words, he started running to the window.

Erwin was confused about what the hell had just happened, and what was happening. But before he could ask, Eren jumped.

And before long he disappeared in the distance.

“What just happen?” Hange asked.

“Don’t know. My priority now is Levi, and I can’t think of any way of saving him.”

“There is no need to, not anymore” Mikasa sad voice said from behind them.

“Why do you say that?”

She just pointed to the place where all of them could see a strange creature, small because of the distance that soon disappeared in a pile of fire.

 

_Hey Levi, I’m sorry!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 5
> 
> I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t went to your rescue when you first needed it. I’m sorry it took me so long to get there.  
> I’m sorry for leaving alone.


	5. Chapter 5

_I’m sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t went to your rescue when you first needed it. I’m sorry it took me so long to get there._

_I’m sorry for leaving alone._

 

I could see the forest. My peace was five minutes away, and god how I wanted to get there fast. I was tired of people, even though the people of that town weren’t as bad as I was used… except the kid, that damned kid was worst then everyone I ever saw.

_Why is the fucker avoiding me?_

_What did I do to him?_

Was it because he would most likely end up in my Squad? Fuck, that wasn’t my fault! If he wanted to get mad at someone it better be at his father. The old man was the one that came up with the fucked-up idea, I didn’t want him there either! He would only fuck up with my Squad. All our training to get the best of a five men team, and now I had to deal with a sixth untrained brat.

Fuck my luck!

I finally reached my destination, and decided to let the horse go on with his life. He was well trained so he didn’t leave, keeping close to me, seeing as I wasn’t going anywhere, he started to munch on the fresh grass at his feet, feet? Shouldn’t I say hooves?

Whatever… you got what I meant, if you didn’t, then you’re stupid!

What was Hange doing at that moment? Probably blowing something, maybe she finally caught the brat and was making her crazy as fuck experiments on him. I would like to see it. See that brat paying for his lack of attention towards me…

_Wait… what?_

_Why do I care? I don’t care about the damned kid. Why would I care if he is paying attention to me or not? I’m not an attention whore! I need his attention! I don’t need his eyes on me! I don’t need those beautiful eyes of his on me… god, his eyes are beautiful, I’ve never seen the ocean, but I bet his eyes are even more beautiful, and it’s not only his eyes, all him is beautiful._

When he fought with Petra the day before, he was shirtless, and damn, was the kid fit! All hard muscle and honey like skin. I wondered if he would taste as sweet as he looked. Those pink lips he always had in a warm smile, except to me, he always had them on a thin line when he saw me. I wonder why…

With the kid on my mind I ended up falling asleep. Falling into a world full of turquoise skies, and warm smiles.

 

When I finally woke up, the fucking horse was in front of me, muzzle almost touching my nose. So, it’s not a surprise to say I jumped as soon as I opened my eyes.

“The fuck are you doing?” I asked the horse, voice cold. “Do you like me that much that you would try to scare me to death?”

The horse made some stupid sound, like he was laughing at me.

“Keep that up, and you’re not eating until we return to HQ.”

I don’t know if he understood, but one thing was clear, he made no more sounds.

Predicting I had spent way too much time out there, I mounted the horse and made my way out the forest. After a while the trees started to open and I could see the fields where cereals where growing with no care in the world.

My mind made backtrack and returned to the kid.

Damn I had spent all fucking day thinking about him. Why? Why wouldn’t he leave my thoughts? From his attitude, I could easily predict he wasn’t on the same page as me…

I was still complaining mentally when I heard them.

Growls and panicked screams. Without a second thought I guided my horse in the direction of the bone shilling sounds.

Did I say it before? No? Yes? Don’t care!

Fuck my luck!

In front of me was a group of farmers running around trying to get away from the monsters after them. At least fifteen titans from what I could see. One farmer was unlucky enough to ran into one of the creatures while looking behind trying to see the titan running after him. The fucker was gone in few seconds, the first titan chewing his face while the other ripped his members off.

Thank fuck I’m always with my swords, and thank fuck Legion horses are well trained.

By the time, I reached the first titan both my hands were occupied with swords, the horse already used to this types of encounters didn’t stray from the creatures, instead running to them, helped me getting rid of the first seven without having to dismount.

While I killed the eighth titan, other killed a second farmer, this time a young woman, some hero started running to her, trying to fight the titan with a hoe, _you’re almost as smart as the beats you’re trying to kill_ , I thought. I screamed at him to get away, but instead of obeying the fucker staid, and died before I could reach him.

Three farmers down, ten titans down, there should only be more five titans and a bunch of farmers left, but I only saw blood, corpses everywhere, at least five farmers were injured, and the titan kept coming, _where the fuck are they coming from?_

I started shouting orders to the remaining farmers, and they started running to me, _that’s not what I meant when I said get to somewhere safe! Like this you’re signing us all for death!_

“Don’t come near me” I shouted again. “Run, get as far from here as you can!”

But the fuckers staid there, and more titans kept appearing.

I was alone, how would I get out of there?

A woman screamed, getting my attention, she had a little child on her arms, and two titans were running after her getting to close for comfort. Grabbing the reins I guided the horse as fast as he would go in the woman direction, in a swift movement I cut the head of the closest titan, reaching out, I grabbed the woman arm and pulled her up, while tending to her, the second titan attacked, hitting me on the shoulder and leaving three profound wounds behind.

“Grab this” I pushed the reins on the woman hands and jumped off the horse, slapping it when I reached the floor. “Get out of here” I order the woman, she just nodded as the horse launched forward.

And just like that shit was even prettier. Ten titans on the ground looking at me, and I could feel the eyes of the ones remaining in the shadows of the trees. My horse was gone, and I could still hear some farmers screaming in the distance. At least I could draw most of them here.

They jumped at me and I summoned my fire, the flames hugged my blades as I spun around cutting everything that got too close.

The screams had died, so the only sound was my ragged breathing and hungry growls from the creatures. My arm was killing me, the wounds were still bleeding, my vison was getting darker, and if I had to guess I didn’t had much more time before I bleed out and lost consciousness, or lose consciousness and then bleed out.

None of the above sounded appealing enough, and the fact the titans were crawling back pressing against each other, was not appealing either.

“I can barely handle you like this, so why the fuck are you merging? Fuck!”

I kept cursing as the fuckers merged together creating a too-fucking-big titan. Where was my back up? Where was my Squad? _Fuck! Where is anyone?_

_Is this how I die? Protecting a bunch of stupid ass farmers, in the middle of nowhere?_

There was no change of me being able to defeat that thing alone. Normally you would need a 10 men Squad, or a specialized Squad like my own, without a Squad your only chance was you Soulmate, this is, if you were lucky enough and your mate and yourself were fucking amazing Master wilders. I was (still am) a Fire Master, one of the best, but I had no Soulmate, Master or Beginner, so I was pretty much getting comfortable with my eminent dismiss when the fucking titan completed his merging.

The fucker was at least forty-five meters tall.

 _Funny_ , I thought, _I’m one of the shortest soldiers on Legion, and I’m about to get killed by one of the tallest titans I’ve ever seen!_ My mind works in strange ways, don’t judge me.

“Well,” I said out loud “I’m not going out without a fight!”

I felt all my fire concentrating on my palm, large titans mean slower titans, and I was betting on it slowly raising my hand aiming at his face and feeling the fire getting stronger inside me, _I will go out with a big fucking bang_ , I thought.

Three seconds until my fire was at his pick, and all it took for it to reach e level of power I had never felt before was the hand that grabbed my wrist right before I unleashed it.

Has the fire destroyed the titan in front of me, I looked down, at the hand that was still holding my wrist, a strange blue-silver light was emanating from the spot where that hand touched me, all my body was on fire as I fell on my knees still looking at the unknown hand touching me, I fallowed the hand until I reach the owner’s face.

Beside me also on his knees was the brat I had spent all day thinking off. His eyes looked into mine and we kept there for longer than necessary just looking at each other, no words were said, I felt my eyes start to close, and I remembered the wounds on my arm, _nice, now I’m losing consciousness!_

I focused on Eren’s eyes again, to see them slowly falling shut, it didn’t took me long before following him to the void.

*

I was awoken by loud voices beside me.

“This was unexpected” Erwin’s voice said.

“Are you joking?” Hanji’s voice shirked “This is awesome!”

_Fuck, I hate her so much!_

“He won’t be pleased” Erwin continued.

“That’s why this is so awesome!”

_Did I say I hate her?_

“They never spoke…”

“Maybe Eren knew and that’s why he kept his distance” Hange mumbled, lost in thoughts probably.

“You think?”

“Well, he did bet with Mikasa about you and Armin!” _The money, now I understand!_ “And let us not forget about the weird conversation they had before Eren left.”

“Right. But this turns everything much more complicated and simple at the same time.”

“Hum? Why?”

“Complicated, because Eren obviously wants as much distance between him as Levi as possible, and now we have even less reason to decline Grisha request; simple, because now there is no chance in hell Eren will be allowed in any other Squad.”

“Hum! Yeah, but were you ever thinking on declining Grisha request?”

“Honestly, I was. We are talking of three of the most promising wilders in existence, they are all leaders, Eren, leader of the Jaeger clan; Mikasa, leader of the militia of the clan; Armin, leader of research and knowledge of the clan. They all have very promising futures, and as much as I want their expertise and knowledge I must think on their safety. And there is no safe place inside the Legion.”

“Right. Changing subjects, when do you think Grumpy will wake up?”

“Call me that again and I will burn your lab” I said, voice husky from disuse.

“How long were you awake?” Erwin asked, raising hand to shut Hange.

“Long enough. Where’s the brat?”

They looked at each other with unreadable expressions, I didn’t like that.

“…Eren has yet to awake.”

“What do you mean? He had no injury!”

“We should let Grisha explain.”

I looked at them with a raised eyebrow, _I really don’t like this_.

“…Ok. How long was I asleep?”

“One day” Hange answered.

“And the brat is still unconscious?”

“Let’s go find Grisha, he must be waiting for you.”

_Have I said that I don’t like this? Because I really don’t like this!_

Grisha was on the same room where we meet him the first time, a glass of wine in one hand and reports on the other. He looked up when Erwin knocked on the door, letting him know we were there.

“You’re awake, good! Please take a seat Captain,” like an afterthought he added “you too commander, Squad Leader.”

“Why is Eren still unconscious?” I asked.

“Straight to the point” Grisha commented with a smile. “How I wish all my people were like that, always talking about everything except what I want to know, it drives me crazy!”

_Well, old hag, you’re the one driving me insane now!_

He must have seen the look on my face because he smiled apologetically, before continuing.

“I don’t know if you are aware of the rumors about the Jaeger clan, especially the rumor related the main family, our curse as many put it” I shacked my head, I had no idea what he was talking about. “Right. The easiest way to explained it is by saying the main bloodline always had a certain proximity with the bond between mates. My wife could see them, and so can Eren. It’s particularly easy for him to see possible future mates. I haven’t spoken with him about it, but if I’m not mistaken he made a bet with his sister and some other friends about Armin and Erwin bond.”

«I don’t need to explain, that he obviously won! My son always had a hero complex about you Captain, so it was a surprise for me when I saw him avoid you at all cost during this last days, I guess that part is now explained. The other thing you need to know about him, us, is the curse. After touching their mate for the first time, all Jaegers fall unconscious, some for three days, others for weeks…

“Why?” I interrupted him.

“It’s their curse. During those days, they will see everything there is to know about their mate, when Carla, Eren’s mother, awoke, she knew everything about me, all my memories were now hers…”

“Is it possible to stop? To awake them?” Hange asked.

I was freckling out inside, I didn’t want him inside my mind, I didn’t want for him, Eren, a man I didn’t knew to know everything about me.

“Since the beginning of the Jaeger clan, many have tried…”

“What happened to them?” I heard my voice ask.

“They all died! And before dying all of them felt extreme pain.”

“If they died, how do you know they felt pain?” the mad scientist asked.

“You don’t need to be inside someone head to know when they are in pain, especially if you are their mate. My wife’s sister fought the curse, I was behind her mate when it happened, she looked like she was being possessed by something. Her mate was on the floor beside her, crying for her, while she screamed for him…”

Grisha last words were muffled by the strong and violent sounds outside, it looked like someone was trying to attack the palace, throwing rocks at the walls.

“The fuck?” I was up before anyone else, my chest hurting with every step I took, but I couldn’t stop, I needed to know what was happening. When I reached the door, it opened violently and a scared maid ran inside.

“My lord, Eren… prince Eren is…”

I didn’t need to hear any more. I started running to the origin of the explosions, my chest hurting more the closer I got. I finally reached the door I to the room where I felt Eren, but I couldn’t open it, I was afraid!

I didn’t know what was happening inside, but the pain in my chest was almost unbearable, I wouldn’t be able to see Eren if he was in this much pain, more if what I remembered from Hange infinite lectures about Soulmates was true. Mates only chare a small percentage of the pain, only enough for them to know their mate is in trouble.

“Fuck this, I can’t leave him alone” I said out loud pushing the doors open.

I wasn’t prepared for what I saw. Nothing ever could prepare me for that image, nothing ever would be able to erase that image from my mind.

 

_Hey Levi,_

_The only thing I could think at that time was that I didn’t want you to know what had happened in my past, and if I wasn’t ready to chare my past, then you probably wouldn’t want me looking throw yours._

_Even though I said that, I was also afraid of knowing. Afraid knowing your past would bring me closer to you, I didn’t want that. I didn’t want to feel anything for you. And if fighting your memories was something that would allow me that, then I would do it!_

_Even if it costed me my life!_


	6. Chapter 6

_It was so painful… the pain was like fire on my skin, burning and leaving awful scars behind. But I needed to fight them! I couldn’t let them inside my mind._

_I didn’t want you inside my mind._

The first thing I saw was the furniture, some floating around other being thrown against the walls. Maids, nurses, healers, everyone was running around like confused and scared cockroaches. Some soldiers tried to approach the bed where I saw Eren, but they were repealed as soon as they took a step forward.

When my eyes finally fell on him I stopped breathing.

Eren was floating over the bed, eyes shut, brows creased, lips parted and teeth clenched, and what shocked me the most, the silent tears running down his beautiful face. I could feel the Air around us, I could feel the anguish, fear, pain, and desperation his Master felt.

I didn’t notice Hanji or Erwin behind me, but I heard the King’s sobbed words.

“He is fighting the memories…”

I kept my eyes on Eren. On that beautiful face now marked by pain. I didn’t want him inside my head, remembering my memories, but I didn’t want him to suffer, I didn’t want him… dead.

“Isn’t there something we can do?”

“Like I said before, no one ever survived the battle” his voice was sorrowful, but he looked conformed… how could he look like that? Eren was his son… his son was fighting against something bigger than all of them, and he was doing nothing to help him.

The Air became more powerful, pushing soldiers and servants out of the room.

“The Air…? Is this normal?” Hanji asked.

“Yes, the Elements will push everyone weaker than the Master away.”

“… get out…”

“Levi? What did you say?” Erwin asked.

“Get out!” I repeated louder.

“Levi calm down” Hanji tried, feeling the Air in the room get warmer.

My Fire and Eren’s Air mixing together to push away unwanted visitors.

“What’s this?” Grisha asked. “This is the first time the Elements join…”

“GET OUT!”

Everyone fell silent as the two Elements became stronger, the soldiers still in the room where thrown out, literally, the maid and healers had ran away earlier, I felt more then I saw as Hanji, Erwin and Grisha where slowly but certainly pushed outside.

“Levi!”

“Captain!”

I could hear them screaming my name from the other side of the door Eren’s Air had closed.

Slowly I approached the figure on the bed. I looked at him as I spoke.

“I don’t want you inside my mind, not now at least. But I don’t want to lose you either. You don’t need to stay by my side if you don’t want to… you don’t even need to look at me if you don’t want to.”

Slowly I brushed some strands of hair away from his face, I let my hand stay there gently feeling his forehead relax under my touch.

“I will leave as soon as you wake up. If you don’t want to join Legion, I will fight against it. But if you do, I will help you. I will fight against you joining my Squad, if that’s what you want.”

The pain inside my chest was growing stronger with each word, I didn’t know who the pain belonged to anymore, I didn’t know if it was his pain for fighting the memories, or mine for promising to stay away from him.

“For some reason… I really don’t want to lose you, brat. If you believe you can win, then fight against my memories, but if you don’t… then give up, I don’t mind. I just hope you don’t hate me even more after seeing them.”

I let my hand slowly caress his face, with little to no force I turned his face to mine, and slowly lowered mine, letting my lips ghost over his, before touching them in a gentle kiss.

“Don’t leave me, Eren” I begged, kissing him again.

I don’t know what possessed me in that moment, but I sat on the top of the bed, carefully resting his head on my lap while I kept caressing his face. During my declaration, the Air had calmed down, and he wasn’t floating anymore. His face looked much more relaxed, and I wondered if he was seeing me memories.

We staid like that for a long while, Air and Fire still mixed together giving the room a warm temperature. Even after what I thought was hours no one walked inside the room again, and I stayed there, caressing his face and humming an old song my mother used to sing to me when I was a child.

The furniture was still broken and scattered around the room, I was still petting Eren’s hair and face and the room was getting darker when a shy maid walked inside with a tray of food for me.

I stayed with Eren for two days, only leaving him for quick showers and after fighting my body necessities for as long as I could before giving up.

After the third day, I stopped, only going there to see how he was, for what Grisha had told us, he should be waking up soon, and as much as I wanted to stay by his side, I couldn’t, I didn’t know if he wanted me there or not, so I stayed away.

 

_I didn’t hear you, I didn’t know you stayed with me._

_But I felt you, I felt your touch, at least I now know it was your touch. At the time I thought I was finally winning, that I could face it all alone._

_I felt your Fire tough, I felt it making me stronger, giving me the energy and will to keep fighting._

_Looking back, o wouldn’t have survived if you weren’t there._


	7. Chapter 7

_Blackness was all I saw. Cold was all I felt… at least in the beginning._

_The pain had long faded, but the emptiness remained, at least for a while._

_Then I felt warm…_

 

Erwin and Hanji’s Squad had left earlier that day, Armin with them, and after a long discussion Mikasa left as well.

Behind stayed my Squad and myself.

No one knew when Eren would wake up, I was on my way to see him when the King stopped me.

“Captain, can I speak with you?”

I just nodded and fallowed the man to an empty room nearby.

“How can I help you?” I asked as soon as the door closed behind me.

“Always straight to the point” the King chuckled a little before regaining his dignified state and pose. “I’m afraid, Captain. And I wished to speak with you in order to calm this demons inside.”

“Demons?”

“Yes, every father’s demons. I’m afraid about my son.”

“How so?”

“Will you stay by his side?”

“If he wishes that…”

“Will you protect him?”

“As I said before, if he wishes…”

“I’m not asking about his wishes, Captain. I’m asking about yours! Will you, Levi, stay by his side?”

“…” I didn’t know what to answer to that.

Eren was my Soulmate, the person I was destined to be with, the person I should sacrifice everything for.

But was I ready for it? Would I be able to stay by his side? To tell him the truth about me? About my own demons?

Would he want me? Would he need me?  Would he trust me? _The memories… did he see them?_ _Does he hate me? Did he heard me?_

So many questions to which I had no answer ready, not without him at least.

I didn’t want a lover, I didn’t want a Soulmate, I didn’t want someone to depend on me… but I was still there… I refused to go back to Legion without him… I had kissed him, begged him to stay alive… I had given him permission to see what others had only heard rumors about.

My past, _did he see it?_

“Captain?” the King called, stealing me from my thoughts. “Your answer?”

If Eren didn’t want me there, would I stay?

_I don’t know…_

Would I go against his wishes?

_Yes, if it meant…_

Would I force him to be with me?

_No!_

Would I hurt him?

_Not on purpose…_

Would I protect him?

_With my life!_

“I will protect him” I answered at last.

“Even if he doesn’t want you too?”

Looking straight at the Kings eyes I made a vow “As long as he needs me I will be there, I will protect him with my life if that’s what it takes. If he wishes for a life without me, I shall make sure it happens, but even then, I will always protect him.”

“Thank you, Captain. That’s all a father can ask for” He got ready to leave, turning his back on me and heading for the door, with his hand on the door handle he stopped. “One more thing, Captain. Please don’t be too harsh with him, Eren has some difficulty trusting people.”

“Why?”

“It’s not my story to tell, just know he has gone through some tough times.”

“Someone hurt him?”

“You’re a sharp one, Captain.” With that he left, leaving me behind confused as fuck.

Forgetting the time and what I was supposed to be doing, I let my body fall against the cushioned chairs and stayed there, looking at the empty celling and thinking about the damn brat, that even unconscious gave me so much trouble.

“What the fuck am I supposed to do? Don’t be harsh on him? I make no promises. And why the fuck did he come with that trust shit to me? I don’t trust easily either. I can understand and respect someone that works that way too…”

 _This brat will be the end of me!_ I thought. And even now I keep saying the same.

 

***

When I finally left the room it was dark outside, the day had long ended. The corridors were empty except some lost maid running around sometimes.

It was late, but I had decided to go see the brat, and that was what I would do. Making my way by the now familiar trail to the infirmary I started to feel him.

The Air around me became warmer and calmer, like he was inviting me to join him.

When I reach my destination the doctors and healers bowed to me and left, the only one in there was Eren, and if I was there they didn’t need to worry as much about him.

I made my way to his bed.

He was still unresponsive, still lost in his own world.

Soft skin shinning with the candle lights around us, lips slightly parted to allow him to breath. I resumed the position I had adopted since I first stayed with him, legs crossed under his head that gently rested there, I played with his hair, remaining silent

He didn’t move, didn’t even flinch under my touch, but I knew he could feel me, the Air around us became lighter, calmer, even more than before. I let my fire merge with it, creating a little warm bubble around us.

“Wake up, brat” I said, petting his wild but soft hair. “I need you to wake up.”

He still didn’t move.

“I made a promise to your father, you will probably hate me for it, but I still did it. I promised I would protect you, that no harm would came to you if I could help it.” Taking a deep breath I kept going. “I didn’t say I would stay by your side, I don’t know if that’s what you want… I don’t even know if that’s what I want…”

Silence…

“Please brat, please wake up.”

I stayed there, petting his hair, talking about nothing, he still didn’t move, didn’t respond, didn’t change.

“I will see you tomorrow…” I said as I moved from his bed.

I didn’t took two steps before something grabbed my arm, it was a weak grip, I could have easily shake it and kept going, but I stopped when I heard it.

“… stay… just a while longer… don’t leave me alone… I don’t want to be alone…”

I turned back to face him, my heart jumping and flipping like a wild beast.

“Eren?”

“Don’t leave me alone…”

“I’m here brat.”

 

_It was so warm… welcoming…_

_Inside my mind it was cold, I kept remembering that time I felt abandoned, alone… cold…_

_You’re not cold, not now and not then._

_I just didn’t know it was you then…_


	8. Chapter 8

_I didn’t know what you had done back then._

_I didn’t know what you had said._

_But I know I heard you, because when you said all that for the second time… I believed you._

 

Even though he spoke to me, Eren didn’t woke up that night.

I spent the night by his side though.

I wouldn’t leave him, I _couldn’t_ leave him, not after what he said.

Still when morning came, I left. I went to my room prepared myself for the day and went looking for my Squad, I needed something to distract me for all that was happening inside my mind.

I didn’t care about the kid, but… I cared too much at the same time.

He was driving me insane without even opening his eyes.

What would I do when he finally woke up? What would I do if he decided to go to Legion? Decided to join my Squad? _I will drive myself mad!_ I concluded.

Why did I had to go to that damned place? _Damn Jaegers!_

Petra was the first to see me, and immediately saluted, the rest soon followed.

“Good morning, Captain!”

“Morning. Let’s change things a little, today we will go with training plan no.6” I informed, they looked at me like I was crazy.

“Sir?” Oluo asked.

“You heard me.” I barked “Get moving!”

“Yes, Sir!” they were still confused, but fallowed my orders all the same.

I had various training plans and routines planned, they all varied from each other, and no.6 was one of the most dangerous ones, dangerous enough that we only did it when the training grounds were empty or close to.

Eld directed the first part of their warm-up and Gunther was in charge of the second part. When they finished, I was in charge again.

“Three teams, Petra and Oluo, Gunther and Eld, against me.”

“Sir?” Gunther started, gaining my attention “Is it really wise to train here? This guards are not used to our type of training, they may get injured.”

“Its fine, I talked with the King already.” Hell I did, but after fucking every plan I had for the day prior that was the least the damn man could do.

***

One hour later, we were still going at it.

The Clan soldiers were all scattered around looking at us in awe, I could feel eyes on my back fallowing every move I made, I had dozens of soldiers looking at me, and it didn’t bother me but however the owner of one set of eyes was, they kept nagging and making me make mistakes I would never do in any other situation.

I felt nervous…

Anxious...

Who owned those eyes?

Petra attacked and I side stepped, throwing a ball of flames in her direction, she moved out of the way but that wasn’t needed as I, once again, messed up my aim.

Oluo made the earth below me open up while the rocks around us morphed into tinny spears that were aimed at my head, Gunther used that time to also attack me, and Eld was waiting above me in case I escaped.

My team was good!

They were the best!

Poor them that I was better, and the anxiety in me was making me pissed beyond comprehension.

I called my Fire and got ready to attack them all simultaneously, “This may hurt a little” I warned, and unleashed the Fire inside me.

***

“That was amazing, Sir!” Petra called when she saw me in the corridors latter that day, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a flame! Oluo and Eld were completely out after that attack…”

She kept blabbing, and I kept thinking.

Yes, it had been amazing and… scary.

I had never unleashed something like that before, my Fire was all over the place, like it had live of its own, I had never felt that powerful… except that I had!

_Eren!_

My mind was back to him, to that damn kid. It was him, I was sure it had to be him, the eyes on me, they belonged to him and he was the cause of the leveling up my powers had.

The only time I had felt that kind of power before was when he gave me his hand, back in the forest while fighting the Titans.

Was this a secondary effect of finding my Soulmate?

Was he the cause of all my recent problems controlling the Fire?

Question and more questions was all that kid gave me.

Questions and Problems.

What the fuck was I supposed to do?

Go back to training?

Return do the basic level of Bending?

“Oh, fuck that!” I spat venomously. Petra jumped besides me, obviously taken off guard by my interruption.

“Sir?” she asked.

I was getting tired of so many _Sirs_ in the same day!

“Nothing, go see how the others are” I ordered, more like barked, at her.

“Yes, Sir!”

_Sir!_

With that she left, I went looking for the cause of my troubles.

And for the second time that day I felt extremely anxious and nervous. Where was that kid?

The Infirmary was empty, there they told me he had woken up during the morning, but no one told me because he had ordered so. I went to the Throne Room next, he wasn’t there either. The maids in the corridors didn’t know where he was. His father didn’t know where he had gone.

What the fuck was wrong with that damned place?

How could they don’t know where the brat was?

He had been comatose for almost one week, how could they let him wander off without knowing where?

I was going crazy!

Two hours of search later I finally found him.

The fucker was in the garden, comfortably seated in the grass playing with leafs that fell from the tree above him. I wanted to scream at him, scold him for not informing me he had awoken, I wanted so many things in that moment, but what came out was not supposed to.

“How are you felling?” I even sounded worried, what the fuck was wrong with me?

“Why do you care?” he sounded the exact opposite from me, he sounded cold, a true block of ice that had learned to speak.

“I was worried, obviously.”

“There was no need.”

I took a deep breath, I couldn’t let my anger take control, I would probably end up saying something I would regret. “Again, how are you?”

“Fine!”

“Did you…”

“No, I didn’t see your memories” he spat, interrupting me.

“Oh… I see. But that’s not was I wanted to ask you.”

“Right.”

“Like I was saying, did you remember anything I told you during your… sleep?” I finished lamely, not knowing what to call to that comatose state he was in.

“Sleep? Seriously?” he scoffed. “I don’t even remember you being there.”

“I see…”

“You _see_ a lot, it seems, shame you don’t see what I want. _Leave!_ ” he says, finally looking at me, all I saw was rage in his eyes, and some shadow deep down that I didn’t understood “I will not go with you! I don’t care what you do or say, I will not be by your side!”

“I didn’t expect you too…” I mumbled, raising my head and voice I speak again “When you were, like that, I made you a promise…”

“I don’t care about empty promises!” he interrupts me, but I keep going.

“I promised I would do as you wanted. If you don’t want to join Legion I will help you fight against it, if you want to join Legion, but not my Squad then I will fight against that… if you don’t ever want to see me again, then I will do as you wish.”

“Empty words” he spat in a murmur I almost didn’t catch.

“I don’t lie, especially when I make promises.”

“Why would you do that?”

“Because it is what you want.”

“You don’t know what I want!”

“Then tell me, explain it to me.”

“Why would I?”

“If you want my help I will give it to you, but I will need to know why I’m doing it.”

“I’m not your lover!”

“I know, and honestly I don’t expect you to ever be.”

“Why?” that seemed caught off guard.

“You haven’t seen my memories, but if you stay by my side you will learn things about me you may not want to know… lovers… they…” how in the fucking hell would I explain what I wanted? I wasn’t good with words like Eyebrows… “Let’s just say that to become lovers two people need to trust each other, like each other in some sense of the word. And I’m not the type of person that is liked by others.”

“You don’t think I will like you?”

“I know you won’t.”

“Why?”

“Why do you need to know? Didn’t you say you don’t plan on joining Legion? Why do you need to know something about a person you will never see again?” _fuck, that hurt_ , saying that hurt like a bitch, and I had to fight to keep my bored mask on.

“I… I thought… you…”

He fell silent, and so did I, we stood there looking at everything except the other, at least he did, once in a while I would raise my eyes to see if he was still avoiding my eyes and _yes, he was_.

“It’s physically painful to be away from your Soulmate.” He said finally.

“What?” I said caught off guard.

“It’s physically painful to be far away from your Soulmate!” he repeated.

I kept looking at him waiting for more.

“Why would you subject yourself to that pain voluntarily?”

“Because that’s what you want. It may be painful to be far away from you, but I’m sure that forcing you to be by my side would be even more.”

“But the second option would only be painful for me, so why? Why would you go out of your away for me?”

“I don’t understand you, kid.”

“Why?”

“Why do you think I want to hurt you? What did I do to make you think that’s what I want?”

“…” he didn’t answer immediately, it seemed like he wouldn’t answer me at all.

“You won’t answer that question, am I right?” he nodded, “Never?” he remained silent, “Will you ever tell me the reason?” I was expecting more silence.

“Maybe one day.”

“Does that mean, you won’t send me away?”

“I’m tired. Good night, Captain.”

“… Good night, my Prince.”

He was far gone, when I let myself think on that awkward conversation again, but it didn’t matter how much I concentrated on the beginning of the conversation I would always return to two simple things.

_“Why do you think I want to hurt you? What did I do to make you think that’s what I want?” “…”_

What had happened to him?

And _“Good night, my Prince”_ of all the things I could have said, I called him Prince, _MY_ Prince, what the fuck was wrong with me?

 

_I was hurt, Levi._

_Someone I loved broke me…_

_I’m sorry for troubling you…_

_I’m sorry for making you fix me…_


	9. Chapter 9

_I’m sorry._

_It seems I say that a lot to you…_

_Maybe because I feel like I didn’t say it enough before._

 

I didn’t know what to expect.

Eren had avoided me for the rest of our stay with the Clan.

I didn’t know what he wanted. He had said nothing about coming with us, so I was expecting him to stay.

And it hurt.

It hurt so fucking much!

I wanted the kid. I wanted him there, by my side.

I didn’t care that I may never be more than a friend to him. But I wanted to be… I wanted to be his friend, at least; his confider, if I could; the person he looked for when troubled, with luck.

I wanted to be by _his_ side!

Soulmates sucked, whoever invented it was a fucking masochist. And I was the one feeling the pain.

_Eren._

_I need the kid_ , was what I understood while my horse approached me.

 _But he doesn’t need me_ , was my conclusion when only my Squad joined me.

Thirty minutes later and we were mounted and ready to go, every belonging stored away, everyone in their place, and the King saying goodbye.

Eld flirting his goodbye to some maid.

Oluo and Petra bickering.

Gunther lost in his own mind looking at the sky.

And I… I was looking at the palace’s doors, waiting for him to come out.

_Please, brat._

“Captain?” Petra asked in a mumble.

Time was up… he wouldn’t come.

“Let’s go!” I ordered.

He had made his choice, now was time for me to keep my promise.

But _fuck,_ each step away from the palace was like a needle piercing my chest. The breeze on my face felt like slaps.

He was the wind, so I guesses that was his away of sending me away.

***

One week.

One fucking week.

One fucking painful week.

One fucking excruciating painful week had passed since I had left the kid’s side.

Mikasa glared at me every time I walked by her, I could deal with that. Armin looked at me like I was a kicked puppy, that pissed me off. Hanji was on me every free second she had, that annoyed me. My Squad remained silent when close to me, that irked me. And so on.

There wasn’t a single person that didn’t pissed me off in Legion.

No one knew the name of my mate but everyone knew they had refused to come with me.

“ _Who would want to be with him?_ ”

“ _Poor guy, he must be in a living hell._ ”

Everyone had something to say, and every time o heard something of the sorts I felt like blowing them up. I didn’t need their pity.

And yes, indeed, _who_ would want to be with me?

The kid was my Soulmate by fate, but why would he want to be with me?

I was currently screaming at Kirschtein for messing the footwork while landing with the 3DMG, his mate was beside him, hearing with head bowed.

“… what the fuck was that? Are you trying to break your fucking foot? If you want to leave just go, don’t waste everyone’s time by playing around…”

“Captain Levi?” a shy voice interrupted me.

“What?” I barked, the kid was taller than me, but in that moment he looked smaller than an ant.

“I’m sorry, Sir. Commander called you.”

“Fuck does he want?” I barked to myself. “Try to _not_ kill yourself while I’m gone!”

“Yes, Sir!” the cadets called back.

I went on my not so merry way, Erwin’s office was on the west wing, and the training grounds I was in was on the far side of the right wing, I had a long way to go before reaching him, so I used that time to think.

Not a good idea.

When I wasn’t training or busy with something my head would always focus on the pain on my chest, and the person behind it.

 _Eren_.

Where was he now?

Would he be training?

Maybe studding?

Was he in pain?

Was he happy?

What would he be doing if he was there?

The pain was more bearable that day, maybe he was traveling close by, would he come to Legion? Or maybe I was just getting used to the pain… who knew?

On and on, questions I would never get the answer to.

What did I do before meeting the kid?

What did I spent my days dreaming about before seeing his eyes?

I couldn’t remember, was like a part of me was missing, the _sane_ part, the part that didn’t hurt.

Hurt…

Pain…

That was how I spent my days after meeting him.

_Eren…_

I buried myself in work, so much that I didn’t have time to think of him.

_Eren…_

I started training the recruits, something I hadn’t done in years.

_Eren…_

I thought I had never call his name before…

_Eren…_

Not with him conscious at least, but in my head his name was the only thing constant.

_Eren…_

The corridors were empty.

Before I could stop it, a sob left my lips. Reaching up I felt my face wet…

_Fuck… Eren… fuck!_

“Why did you leave me?” I asked the Air around me. “It’s painful… please… make it stop…” I begged, using the wall to support me when my legs gave out. “I didn’t left you…”

The sobs got stronger, and the tears fell faster.

I gave up on Erwin and stayed there, the pain was too much for me to bear.

I wanted the brat.

Why? I didn’t know. How had I fall that fast? I didn’t know either.

What I knew was that I needed him… and he wasn’t there.

 

_I’m sorry!_

_Please Levi, forgive me._


	10. Chapter 10

 

_There was so much pain Levi._

_Watching you leave… I don’t know how I did it, I don’t know how I was able to stay behind…_

_What I did know, was that seeing you again felt marvelous._

_And I was afraid._

 

 

I ended up giving up on Erwin for good. When the tears stopped I went to my room and locked the door. After a long bath I found refuge in my bed.

The pain was still there.

Erwin would probably scream at me after finding out where I was. But I didn’t thought he would do something too drastic seeing as even him was acting differently around me ever since I returned without Eren.

Falling into a restless sleep I managed to evade the pain in my chest for a while.

Not long though… the pain in my chest was substituted by the pain in my head the loud banging on my door was conjuring, the first thing to come to mind where different ways of painfully killing whoever was on the other side of that god forsaken door.

It took me too fucking long to get to the portal to hell, grabbing the handle I pulled the door open just to see Mad-Scientist grinning like the idiot she was.

“Fuck you want?”

“Erwin sent me for you!” Hanji says.

“I don’t want you.” I got ready to close the door, praying it would hit her stupid face, instead it hit her foot preventing me from slamming the door shut.

“Not so fast, Sleeping Ugly. Erwin sent me to _get_ you, he needs to speak with you. Now!”

I was too damn slow in that moment.

Slow enough for the lack of pain in my chest to go unnoticed…

“I need to shower.” I said plainly.

“Levi Ackerman!” she yells, I think I’m in trouble now.

There are only two reasons for Hanji to call someone by their first and last name, first she’s reading it, no big problem, second she’s pissed and your head will be rolling soon if you don’t do what she says.

“What!? I need to shower!”

“Get your skinny little ass moving, now, or I’m dragging you there!”

In my defense, I had just awoke and couldn’t really understand all the urgency.

“Why does he need me that badly?”

“Because he called you yesterday and you bailed after leaving the trainees on their own.”

Yesterday? I slept that long? “Fuck!”

“Yeah. Get moving Grumpy, I’m taking you to him.”

Guess I couldn’t really escape after that…

We walked in silence all the way to Erwin’s office, normally I would thank any god in existence for the lack of spewed stupidity from Hanji, but I was restless. A silent Hanji was a bad premonition for me, it always had been, and the fact her grin was growing with every step we took wasn’t helping calm my nerves in the least.

I could see the door to Eyebrows office, Hanji stopped and gestured for me to keep walking.

“You’re not coming?”

“I have nothing to do there. My job here is done” she turned and started walking, leaving me alone in there. Maybe I could wait for her to disappear and run away too… “And don’t think of going anywhere except that office, he knows you’re here already!”

_Fuck!_

I braced myself for my eminent doom and made my way.

 _Raise your hand and open the door! He can’t give you more pain than the one you already feel_ , great way of encouraging someone conscious, great work!

_Pain._

Lost in thoughts I opened the door.

_My chest doesn’t hurt._

Erwin wasn’t inside…

_Why doesn’t it hurt?_

 But someone else was…

_Did something happen to Eren?_

And I knew that hair…

_Is he ok? Does he need my help?_

I would recognize that rich chocolate color anywhere…

 _“Eren?”_ I didn’t know if I thought it or if I just said out loud either way, he turned around and it was stronger than me.

Launching my arms forward I hugged him, like our lives depended on it.

At the moment it felt like they did. And I was afraid he would disappear if I let him go… again.

I could feel his body against mine, rigid, tense, trembling and I was afraid… afraid I was hurting him, afraid I was stepping over some line…

 _Let him go_ , I thought, _but I can’t! This feels right, he feels right._

How much I wanted to keep on hugging him, keep him there, close to me, against me…

“I’m sorry” I said, letting him go.

It hurt so freaking much…

“I-I’m sorry too…”

“For what?” having him there, in front of me, made it difficult to imagine the time he had been gone, the past week was lost in the back of my mind.

“For lea-leaving you…” his voice was merely a whisper, lost between the soft hiccups and sobs.

I wanted to hug him again, but I was so afraid of hurting him even more, of making those tears permanent.

“Can-can I hug you?” _seriously Levi? Stutter? You’re stuttering?_

That must have caught him of guard, his eyes were on mine both ordering me to keep my distance and pleading for me to get close, and once again I was lost in the ocean they entrapped.

“I hurt you… why do you still want to touch me?”

“I feel like I hurt you too, and you never gave me a reason to stay away… much on the contrary. Let me protect you…” _please._

I could see in his eyes he understood the unspoken word and somehow, I think that was the only reason he allowed it, because soon after that his arms were on me.

 _Gentle_ , that was the only way I had of explaining the way he touched me, like I was a fragile doll that could break at any moment. Softly raising my arms I let them fall a little above his waist, with just enough force to keep them there, if he wanted to break the hug it was in his hands and I would do nothing to stop him.

“Don’t you have someone else?” he asked against my shoulder, voice barely a whisper.

“What do you mean?” I asked back in the same tone.

“I heard soldiers often have… _friends_ among other soldiers…”

“ _Friends_? You mean Fuck buddies?” I almost laughed at how stupid it sounded “I don’t… why?”

“I was curious…” he answered immediately.

“Liar” I murmured in his ear and, as reward, I felt him shiver against me.

“I’m not…” he said voice louder and borderline aggressive.

“I was kidding… I’m sorry.”

“Is just… like…”

“Forget it…”

“But…”

“Explain whenever you want or when you feel comfortable with it.”

“You are a strange man, Captain.”

“So are you, my Prince.”

I could feel his smile on my shoulder, and even though it was a small smile and I couldn’t see it, it made me happy.

I had him there.

 

 

_I was afraid when Commander left me there alone, I was terrified when he sent Hanji get you…_

_But seeing you again… I was petrified!_

_It felt right to have you there, I felt safe with your arms around me._

_It felt marvelous when I hugged you back._

_And I finally started to enjoy my title._


	11. Chapter 11

_I used to think everything happens for a reason…_

_I just don’t know why I had to find_ him _there, so near the one I belonged to…_

_So near you…_

I had just spent my first night with Eren by my side, we didn’t cuddle, we didn’t hug, we didn’t even touch each other… we just laid there, side by side, like corpses, too afraid of the repercussions of touching the other.

We must have looked like two love struck kids terrified of touching the other but always craving for the feeling of the other’s skin against ours, except we didn’t love each other, we just had the permanent urge of needing and craving the others presence.

When I opened my eyes, I was alone and my first thought was that everything had been a dream. The only thing that made me believe the opposite was the lack of pain in my chest along with the gauchely folded clothes, at the end of the bed, that didn’t belong to me.

He was here!

Eren was here.

But why was I alone?

_Did I do something out of bounds during the night?_

Starting to freak out I got up and started to get ready, always thinking on what had happened the day before.

After leaving Erwin’s office we went for a walk, the recruits had already gotten inside for dinner, the grounds were empty. I told him everything I could remember about the types of trainings we did, the uses of each building, showed him everything.

We had our fingers intertwined, that was the only physical contact between us… _had that been too much?_

When I had run out of things to say we made our retreat to my apartment (as Captain I had the privilege of having a mini apartment to myself), it was a mandatory thing that mates shared a room, we had nothing to say in the matter.

I had offered to sleep on the couch, but he had said it was my house so I should take the bed and he would take the couch… after one hour we finally agreed in sharing the bed, it was big enough for the two of us after all.

After, when all lights were turned off and we laid silently in bed, I thought sleep would come easily, I was so damn tired, but how wrong I was…

Having him beside me, made me more conscious of everything, his breathing, every move he made, he fell asleep first, but even like that I couldn’t sleep… it was almost morning when I finally managed to fall asleep.

_Did I do something while unconscious?_

Getting out of the apartment I made my way to the dining hall, when I finally reached it I looked around trying to find Eren with no luck.

Where the fuck had he disappeared to?

Maybe with his sister and Coconut, they had been separated for o long while too. With a new target I started hunting for the Blondie and the Raven Bitch.

I find Mikasa, but before I could go to her she runs to me.

“Do you know where Eren is?”

“I thought he was with you…”

“Fuck!” with that she tries to leave, all the while mumbling curses “Why did that bastard had to be here? I will kill him… I will make him pay for all the pain he caused…”  I grab her arm before she can get far.

“What happened?” Her words make me worried, in answer to those feeling my Fire started to grow, roar for blood of someone I knew had made something to Eren.

“Nothing!”

“Mikasa” my voice was coated with authority as well as something else, I could feel the heat emanating from my body, a silent warning about the strength of my Fire… a Fire that I was fighting hard to rein “What. Happened?”

“You- you should go find Eren…” Mikasa was stammering, I could see a few drops of sweat running down her neck… disgusting.

Armin came to us then.

“Mikasa! Captain…?” he reached a hand out, obviously trying to touch Mikasa, but thinking better of it when he saw what was going on “Is everything ok?”

“The Captain, was just looking for Eren.” Mikasa says after realizing I wouldn’t say anything.

“Do you know where he is?” I ask Armin.

“No, I searched everywhere I could, but no sign of him.”

“At the castle, where does he go when he’s upset?”

“The gardens” the duo answers immediately.

The image of Eren playing with leaves under a tree comes to the front of my mind, I should had figured it out, earlier.

“Thank you.”

“Captain... no, Levi, please be careful with what you say or do… Eren doesn’t deal well with the Soulmate thing.”

“I already know that, but thanks.”

Legion doesn’t have a garden per se, we do have a forest… the closest thing to a garden is a secluded clearing north, but barely anyone knows it exists, Eren couldn’t be there, as the only way to reach it is throw labyrinth of trees and rocks.

I focus on him, willing the bond between us to guide me to him, and soon I start walking in the direction I hope is the correct one.

As I go deeper into the forest my thoughts get wild.

_What happened?_

_Why is he here?_

_Why did he run away?_

_Does he want me there?_

As the last question pops up I find him, hunched over himself with the wind blowing away around him.

“Eren?” I ask, not daring to get closer.

“Why are you here?” his voice is cold again, and once again I’m remembered of the time I found him in the garden.

“I was worried, your friends are worried.”

“Did they tell you?”

“They told me nothing, just… that you don’t like this thing… Soulmate thing.”

He laughs then, a broken laugh mixed with sobs.

“I hate it!”

“Can I ask why?”

“You can ask.” _But you won’t answer_ , I complete mentally.

We stay like that for a while, he still hugging his knees and I resting against the closest tree.

“I grew up without a clan,” I say “my mother was rapped when she was still a child, instead of protecting her, her clan protected the rapper, saying she deserved it and that it was her duty. She ran away soon after. When I was born she leaved in the streets, and without means to care for me she started selling herself…”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Let me finish” I say, not daring to look at him “Like I was saying… with no means to take care of me she became a prostitute… when I was four, she died of starvation and disease. This all started because of the rape, the rapist, my father, was her Soulmate, so, as you can imagine, I never had that good of an impression on the topic.” I looked at him then, his eyes were red and puffy, a single tear caressing his face.

I kneel in front of him, and slowly lifted my hand to his face drying the tear with my hand, I kept the hand in place, caressing his face.

“I don’t want to hurt you… but I need you to talk to me. I won’t know what I’m doing, right or wrong, if you keep on running.”

He looked at the floor, red tinting his cheeks.

“I like your touch” he mumbled, leaning into my hand before straightening “But I can’t allow myself that luxury.”

“Why?” my hand was back by my side.

“I… the last time I let someone touch me I got hurt… I can’t allow that to happen again.”

“I don’t want to hurt you…”

“I know…”

“And I won’t let you hurt yourself because of fear!”

“What?”

“You are afraid… of this. I can say that with certitude. I just don’t know why, and you don’t need to tell me if you’re not ready, but I do know that this his hurting you…”

“…How?”

“I’m your Soulmate, Idiot. It’s part of the deal to know when the other is hurting…”

“I’m not an Idiot!” he said, almost pouting.

“I don’t want us to be lovers” I say, remembering once again our previous conversations, more like discussions “but I do want us to be friends.”

“Why?”

“This is a lifetime deal, Brat.”

“I would like that too, Old Man” he says, a shy smile on his lips.

“We should get back, though…” I inform after looking at the sky, how long did we stay there?

“…”

“Eren?”

“I don’t want to go to the base…”

“Why? Did someone hurt you?”

“Kind of…”

“Speak!” he looked at me then, eyes wide with surprise.

“Wha-what?”

“What happened at the base? Were you hurt or attacked by someone?”

It wouldn’t be a novelty, the fact that Legion had people from various clans made the base a lively place as well as a savage one, especially to new recruits.

“I wasn’t… I wasn’t attacked…” the confusion and surprise on his face made me reevaluate the situation.

Eren was an Air Master, one of the best, if not _the_ best, but most people had yet to figure out he was my mate, which left only the craziest to try and hurt him, but the only really crazy one was Hange, and she would never do that, she knew his value.

“What happened?” I asked again, this time my confusion was evident.

“I just… saw someone.”

“Do you want me to make someone’s live a living hell?” I asked him, not knowing if I was joking or not, he looked at me surprised and a little intrigued “I train the recruits.” Was all I said as way of explaining, I didn’t really felt like explaining I only did it to distract myself from the pain that was being away from him.

“I will think about it…”

“If you don’t want to return to the base yet, I can show you a place where barely anyone goes…” I offered “That is, if you want me here.”

“Secret place?” he asks, eyes shining.

“Something like that…” I say with a little smile of my own.

“I… would like that.”

_I didn’t know what to expect when you found me…_

_Still, I was happy you did._

_I couldn’t start trusting you just like that, but everything you said and did that day, made me believe that I would be able to trust you soon. That you were more than worthy of that trust._

_And for all the times I apologized, I know must thank you._

_Thank you, Levi._

_For making me start to believe again._

**Author's Note:**

> Tell me what you think of this…
> 
> Comments, critiques and kudos are always welcomed.
> 
> Thank you, see ya next time (hopefully)!


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